Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Crappy McCrappington

Yes, my friends, this is what I would call today...

  • TC's in Seattle. That always gets me in a great mood. I know, I'm one of those wifeys that actually enjoys my husband's company and I do not look forward to a few days alone. Now, that may change in the future, but for right now, this chickie misses her hubby.
  • I just started the inactive pills in my pill pack. Most of you know what that means so I won't even say it.
  • I have a dang Ace-like bandage wrapped around my bosom. I'm trying to get these puppies dried up and at the same time, trying to avoid infection.
  • I talked to a friend today and she was just Ms. Negative-Energy and that really bummed me out.
  • The trash can is FULL and I DO NOT take the garbage out in the dark. I'll have to do that during one of X-man's naps tomorrow.
  • X-man was in rare form today. Oh there was the occassional giggle and smiley moment, but there was alot of crying. Most of it when he was in the high chair and I was trying to feed him some chicken noodle dinner. He's probably having all kinds of issues leading to this, including but not limited to: ears might still be bothering him (in spite of being on day 7 of the antibiotic), tummy not feeling perfect since it's trying to digest formula instead of mamma's milk, picking up on the fact that I'm not exactly in the best mood.
  • Unsolicited advice at choir practice from the lactation consultant. Ok, I went to choir practice essentially for the hour and a half of child care and for some grown up conversation. The LC asked me if I was still nursing and I kinda shrugged. She proceeded to tell me that it was supply-and-demand, I should nurse him all day if he wanted, and I should take him to bed with me and just let him nurse all night. Ok, this works for some people and if that works, I say go for it! If I thought I was making enough milk for the little guy, I'd still be nursing him!

That leads me to what I think my major point of anxiety is: I'm afraid I've done something terribly wrong by quiting the nursing cold turkey. Now, I know that this very topic could start a firestorm, but that's not what I'm going for. I'm also not going for people to tell me that I've done exactly the right thing (or conversely, tell me that I'm correct and I have completely screwed up at being mamma). I'm just saying that all these decisions as a mamma (or daddy...I know you're out there your rare spare moments when Mr. W is sleeping!) bring with them questions. I've just got to realize that as long as I'm not putting X-man in harm's way, I'm probably ok with my decision. And you can find people that are for or against most any decision you could want to make, anyway.

So, now that I've gotten that off my chest (along with the ace-like bandage, for the evening only), I'm going to crawl into my nice warm bed. And while a heated mattress pad is not a good substitute for a snuggle-buddy, it certainly does help to make the bed nice and comfortable.

And TC comes back Friday, so it's really only one more day he'll be gone. I can handle that...


Sarah said...

Hey there: you aren't doing anything wrong by stopping cold turkey. There's likely a combination of factors that's causing Xman to be cranky pants, but it's not all you. There is nothing wrong with your decision, no matter what anyone says. You do what is right for your family, and no one else can say a word. If that LC wants to nurse all day all night round the clock, let her. But it's your child and your decision. You're the mommy. Go you.

PitterPatter said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PitterPatter said...

Well honey, you know me and my attitude. I personally would tell the nipple nazi to shove it. I know you are doing the best thing for you and your baby and that's all that matters. Trust me I understand. Some of the looks I've gotten from people when I told them I wasn't breast feeding, you'd think I'd told them I was giving him bottles full of beer and vicodin. If I'd thought there was any chance at all of success I'd still be trying to breast feed but it just wasn't going to work for us. So, do what's best for you and X-man and don't give the boob brigade a second thought. I love you!